The Two Sides of Me

This is me. 

This is me. 

I'm not sure if the two me's overlap, or if they are completely different?


Part of me has a life. 

I sew.

I model.
I read.
I write (and have manuscripts to prove it).
I have friends (and spend time with them. At least long enough for a selfie).
I have family.
I always have something big happening, normally more than one thing at a time.
And my clothes are very . . . shall we say artistic?
Mostly I smile, but sometimes I share about pain, or my Dad being in a car accident and nearly dying, or rocky friendships, or stress. I have a colorful life, and the colors spread from pink to black, to all the shades between.
Overall, when you see me you see an unending variety of life.

Part of me has no life . . . 

. . . Yet, that part of me seems to be obsessed with mirrors and smiling and cleaning.
EVERYTHING is clean.
My humor is clean.
My singing is clean (and the toilet brush is my mic).
My friends are clean.
My day is clean. 
I walk to work because that keeps my body clean.
I'm always, ALWAYS, always cleaning.
Except my clothes are atrocious. Too big. UGLY. But at least they are of a clean fashion.
This is my everyday life. 

Even my satire is some sort of twisted cleaner's lingo.

Question: What do you call a cleaner's ex?
Answer: A dirt bag.

Acceptable marriage proposal: Will you clean only my house forever? Be my house cleaner.


Having two Instagrams and keeping them both active actually isn't that hard. And, all joking aside, I don't feel like two different people. I don't feel like I have no life vs have too much life. 
I love all of my life. Even though I rarely talk about my work on my regular page and rarely talk about my life/ writing on my cleaning page, I don't feel like I have a split personality. Not really. Though . . . sometimes I wonder? 
Because I never have to think about which post belongs on which page . . . 
I know where the different sides of me belong. 
Is that weird? 


Do you ever feel like there's more than one side to who you are? If so, I don't think that's bad. Just think about it . . . we humans are too complicated to be just one thing. The more alive we are the more there is to us. In fact, I believe all of us have hundreds and hundreds of sides. And that's why identity is so complicated. We like things simplified—but how can we be simplified with a single word when there's so much to who we are? 

Also, if you don't follow me on either of my Instagrams, feel free to add me! Because the pictures are so fun, yes? 

P.S. I have no idea when I wrote this post, but it's been waiting for a long time to be posted. But since I wrote it, I've stumbled across this fun Instagram post that really summarizes up the heart of what I'm saying here. Enjoy!