What a powerful conclusion to this master guide for wearing dresses. I never quite pinpointed the feeling I get after wearing exclusively dresses for a few days as "vulnerability," but that is spot-on. "You will look like a woman among sexless beings."
At this point I am finally quite content in my identity of being an old-fashioned, feminine, religious woman. But maybe I am still growing into my identity as a 𝘣𝘦𝘢𝘶𝘵𝘪𝘧𝘶𝘭 woman. Thank you, Keturah, for this wonderful article.
Thank you for this article, Keturah. I grew up wearing dresses and still do, and many of the things you wrote about are instinctual for me. I love wearing dresses and I feel much more respect from the general public in a dress than out of one. It also works backwards, the respect thing. I have more respect for people when I am respectful of my femininity.
Thank you for the time you took to put this piece together. Dresses, for me, were mostly only worn to church, and the dresses I wore to church were nice, not for playing or doing anything other than church in. Although, I have always preferred the look of dresses and skirts (especially if my Pinterest board is anything to go by) I struggled to find dresses I liked in person, struggled with my appearance and body image, and for a long time, was frustrated by experiencing existence within a body. I preferred to “blend in” in the hopes of literally not being seen.
Prompted by never-ending pain from pants rubbing autoimmune lesions between my thighs, I have begun slowly transforming my wardrobe to contain more dresses and skirts, which are pain-free for me. I purchased a skirt for work, something that matches my uniform and looks far better than the pants I was wearing. At least until the custom uniform skirts come in the mail. I am the only person in the office in a skirt, my colleagues compliment my skirt daily. It’s an ankle length wrap skirt, it is the most comfortable I have been in years, to the point where I feel like a child again because I am not spending all day in pain and fussing with my clothes, thinking about how much I hate my clothes and how they feel.
There are a few tricks that I am quickly learning. Remembering to lift my skirt as I walk up stairs is one, trying to make sure I am not stepping on my hem when I come up from squatting down, and since its a wrap skirt, being mindful of squatting so I don’t suddenly flash someone my boxers (i purchased a bunch of 7” length boxers as my thigh chafing protectors). Holding down the wrap when it’s windy. It takes a little bit more mindfulness but the freedom of movement and comfort I have found is thrilling.
I have noticed more men being more attentive when I am in a skirt. More men notice the skirt and stare which I don’t know how to respond to, I don’t really like the eyes on me. It won’t stop me from wearing skirts or dresses, not when I have finally found comfort and freedom.
I am in the process of finally purchasing a desk for my sewing machine so I can get set up and back into sewing. I would like to sew myself a more complete wardrobe.
I have an 8mo daughter who mostly wears dresses and I’ve never had an issue buckling her into anything, even with long or full skirts. I’ve figured out that if you pull the back of the skirt up between the legs and tuck the front down between the legs towards the back, it makes a kind of harem pant and it is quite easy to get her buckled into her car seat (or stroller, high chair, buckle carrier…) safely and snugly. It’s never felt more complicated than it did with my son in pants.
I’ve been wearing dresses exclusively since having my son; I didn’t fit into any of my jeans and I just couldn’t find the motivation to go find new ones. Yesterday we went on a family hike; I wore an old skirt and tennis shoes. We walked through the woods to a lakeshore and I nursed my daughter sitting on a log while my husband tossed rocks in the water with our 3yo son. It was hot and humid and I was sweaty and dusty. It was the most feminine I’ve ever felt.
Yes, you’re right to point out that a dress doesn’t make it impossible to strap a child into anything! My siblings certainly had their fair share of car-seat experiences in a dress :)
I loved reading this ❤ I will be 75 soon and have been more and more drawn to wearingdresses and making or altering my clothes to express the lady I feel I am, which i was taught to suppress. Especially beauty, which I felt inside but was taught to hide. Sounds strange but thank you for your words and practical wisdom 🙏 because it's never too late to bloom, and feel free. In fact it's time. And dresses are super comfortable 😍
Your pictures of women farming in dresses brought to mind the many times I’ve visited an Orthodox monastery and worked alongside the nuns, shoveling manure and milking sheep and stirring marmalade all in ankle-length skirts! They’re pros! They even make full prostrations look easy, which is quite the feat.
This has encouraged me to take the dive into wearing dresses outside of church! Even that I’ve only been doing for about a year, so this is new territory to me. I’m halfway through my third pregnancy and I loatheeee anything touching my abdomen, my shape changes so every pregnancy I need to buy new jeans, etc., so dresses are just what’s sensible now. Thank you for the time and labor of love you put into this, truly so kind of you to do so!
Yay! I’ve been looking forward to this article. I’ve only worn dresses/skirts since age 13 but am about to buy 10 acres and do a bunch of new farming stuff so I appreciated many of the tips. :)
Thank you for this! I really appreciate you publicly writing about this, it’s very helpful to know there are others who only wear skirts/dresses, since I often feel like I’m the only one!
I am currently switching to wearing dresses more, so this was perfect timing! Any suggestion(s) on where to buy good quality tights? I've struggled a bit with finding ones made of natural fiber.
It is really hard to find tights!! I look at thrift stores and on Etsy and still struggle because the options vary. My mom used to be able to find nice cotton ones for us at Walmart. I haven’t seen any there in a long time! I will probably end up making myself a pair at some point …
I grew up wearing dresses to church or for special occasions and pants or shorts the rest of the time but I was an active girl and liked to play. My dad had a rule that if I couldn't do it in my church clothes I couldn't do it on the Sabbath so I learned to play and to cartwheel and climb trees in dresses. A couple years ago I turned to God and have stopped wearing pants (aside from pajamas or under a skirt). I have since learned many things such as shearing sheep can be done in a skirt and so can riding a bike (I'll have to use your tip for full skirts being tucked over the seat since I really do like them).
My biggest question is where do you get the wool you sew with (is it pure wool?), and how did you make your snowpants?
I thrift most of my wool skirts (it’s really hard to find ones I like that fit me well, but I’ve managed to find two or three over the years, which is all I really need). Last year I found a guy on FB market place selling a bunch of wool fabric of various cuts and colors from an old woman’s house that had just passed. I bought a bunch of that and made my snow pants out of that. I will be making some baby things too! I made myself a wool dress a few years ago out of scraps. I contacted a clothing company called Revivall (she mades wool overalls) asking her if she had scraps I could buy. At the time I was working for her so she gave me a black trash bag. However, you can now buy dead-stock wool scraps on her website, I believe.
Ah! I am so excited to read this in more detail, as I was discouraged from dresses my whole life, and now, at 38, I have been finding myself drawn to them for a few years, but throw on jeans often "for convenience."
My quick little skim gifted me the gift of approaching the toilet the OPPOSITE way, as I have dipped the off skirt by accident, as well as feel quite gross about it pooling on the floor or toilet back.
Doing things in dresses truly isn’t as hard as we’ve been led to believe. I don’t have a picture but I once assisted a dental surgery in a hospital while wearing a floor length dress and it didn’t hinder me in the slightest. I wasn’t raised to do everything in dresses and no one else with the exception of my best friend was doing it but I genuinely can’t think of a single activity I do that can’t be done in a dress, and I’ve tested them all! I’ve found that having an assortment of homemade half circle skirts in various fabrics and lengths will set me up for almost any occasion. Thank you for writing this!
For decades I worked a desk job, and found that my physiognomy was happier in long loose dresses and skirts, rather than pants. I got in the habit of wearing flannel-lined dungarees when not at work, because I lived in a cold-climate area, and because they were loose enough to be comfortable. Feminine they were not. Once I retired, I started wearing those weekend dungarees all the time, and soon realized that wasn’t how I wanted to appear in the world. So I’m wearing skirts again, and it’s fine. Better than fine. Because yes, it makes a statement. At a blood donation site one time, I was approached by another woman who said “You’re wearing a skirt: are you a Christian?” And I suspect that part of civilization’s catastrophe is that men and women are no longer seen as separate kinds of people. I have been wearing my therapeutic sneakers with the skirts, which looks pretty sad, but have just chosen to get some Sunday shoes, at least. And forty-odd years ago, I hiked the Grand Canyon in a long skirt which I had made from a vintage chair-covering n my parents’ home: I don’t know what the fabric was, but it was brown, and there were white fringes on the border of the round-cornered fabric piece, which I incorporated into the finish. It was fun to wear, and went quite well with my hiking boots.🥳
What a powerful conclusion to this master guide for wearing dresses. I never quite pinpointed the feeling I get after wearing exclusively dresses for a few days as "vulnerability," but that is spot-on. "You will look like a woman among sexless beings."
At this point I am finally quite content in my identity of being an old-fashioned, feminine, religious woman. But maybe I am still growing into my identity as a 𝘣𝘦𝘢𝘶𝘵𝘪𝘧𝘶𝘭 woman. Thank you, Keturah, for this wonderful article.
"Still growing into my identity as a beautiful woman." So wonderfully and accurately expressed
Thank you for this article, Keturah. I grew up wearing dresses and still do, and many of the things you wrote about are instinctual for me. I love wearing dresses and I feel much more respect from the general public in a dress than out of one. It also works backwards, the respect thing. I have more respect for people when I am respectful of my femininity.
Thank you for the time you took to put this piece together. Dresses, for me, were mostly only worn to church, and the dresses I wore to church were nice, not for playing or doing anything other than church in. Although, I have always preferred the look of dresses and skirts (especially if my Pinterest board is anything to go by) I struggled to find dresses I liked in person, struggled with my appearance and body image, and for a long time, was frustrated by experiencing existence within a body. I preferred to “blend in” in the hopes of literally not being seen.
Prompted by never-ending pain from pants rubbing autoimmune lesions between my thighs, I have begun slowly transforming my wardrobe to contain more dresses and skirts, which are pain-free for me. I purchased a skirt for work, something that matches my uniform and looks far better than the pants I was wearing. At least until the custom uniform skirts come in the mail. I am the only person in the office in a skirt, my colleagues compliment my skirt daily. It’s an ankle length wrap skirt, it is the most comfortable I have been in years, to the point where I feel like a child again because I am not spending all day in pain and fussing with my clothes, thinking about how much I hate my clothes and how they feel.
There are a few tricks that I am quickly learning. Remembering to lift my skirt as I walk up stairs is one, trying to make sure I am not stepping on my hem when I come up from squatting down, and since its a wrap skirt, being mindful of squatting so I don’t suddenly flash someone my boxers (i purchased a bunch of 7” length boxers as my thigh chafing protectors). Holding down the wrap when it’s windy. It takes a little bit more mindfulness but the freedom of movement and comfort I have found is thrilling.
I have noticed more men being more attentive when I am in a skirt. More men notice the skirt and stare which I don’t know how to respond to, I don’t really like the eyes on me. It won’t stop me from wearing skirts or dresses, not when I have finally found comfort and freedom.
I am in the process of finally purchasing a desk for my sewing machine so I can get set up and back into sewing. I would like to sew myself a more complete wardrobe.
I have an 8mo daughter who mostly wears dresses and I’ve never had an issue buckling her into anything, even with long or full skirts. I’ve figured out that if you pull the back of the skirt up between the legs and tuck the front down between the legs towards the back, it makes a kind of harem pant and it is quite easy to get her buckled into her car seat (or stroller, high chair, buckle carrier…) safely and snugly. It’s never felt more complicated than it did with my son in pants.
I’ve been wearing dresses exclusively since having my son; I didn’t fit into any of my jeans and I just couldn’t find the motivation to go find new ones. Yesterday we went on a family hike; I wore an old skirt and tennis shoes. We walked through the woods to a lakeshore and I nursed my daughter sitting on a log while my husband tossed rocks in the water with our 3yo son. It was hot and humid and I was sweaty and dusty. It was the most feminine I’ve ever felt.
Yes, you’re right to point out that a dress doesn’t make it impossible to strap a child into anything! My siblings certainly had their fair share of car-seat experiences in a dress :)
I loved reading this ❤ I will be 75 soon and have been more and more drawn to wearingdresses and making or altering my clothes to express the lady I feel I am, which i was taught to suppress. Especially beauty, which I felt inside but was taught to hide. Sounds strange but thank you for your words and practical wisdom 🙏 because it's never too late to bloom, and feel free. In fact it's time. And dresses are super comfortable 😍
Your writing is so delightful to read. I always find something to think about!
You also have a gift for holding strong opinions yet not sounding angry at other people who might be different.
Your pictures of women farming in dresses brought to mind the many times I’ve visited an Orthodox monastery and worked alongside the nuns, shoveling manure and milking sheep and stirring marmalade all in ankle-length skirts! They’re pros! They even make full prostrations look easy, which is quite the feat.
And, if you don't sew and want clothes made in the US: https://www.classicclothingstore.com/Default.asp
I have been wearing her tiered denim skirts for at least ten years. Everything I've bought fits and is comfortable.
This has encouraged me to take the dive into wearing dresses outside of church! Even that I’ve only been doing for about a year, so this is new territory to me. I’m halfway through my third pregnancy and I loatheeee anything touching my abdomen, my shape changes so every pregnancy I need to buy new jeans, etc., so dresses are just what’s sensible now. Thank you for the time and labor of love you put into this, truly so kind of you to do so!
Yay! I’ve been looking forward to this article. I’ve only worn dresses/skirts since age 13 but am about to buy 10 acres and do a bunch of new farming stuff so I appreciated many of the tips. :)
Thank you for this! I really appreciate you publicly writing about this, it’s very helpful to know there are others who only wear skirts/dresses, since I often feel like I’m the only one!
I am currently switching to wearing dresses more, so this was perfect timing! Any suggestion(s) on where to buy good quality tights? I've struggled a bit with finding ones made of natural fiber.
It is really hard to find tights!! I look at thrift stores and on Etsy and still struggle because the options vary. My mom used to be able to find nice cotton ones for us at Walmart. I haven’t seen any there in a long time! I will probably end up making myself a pair at some point …
I grew up wearing dresses to church or for special occasions and pants or shorts the rest of the time but I was an active girl and liked to play. My dad had a rule that if I couldn't do it in my church clothes I couldn't do it on the Sabbath so I learned to play and to cartwheel and climb trees in dresses. A couple years ago I turned to God and have stopped wearing pants (aside from pajamas or under a skirt). I have since learned many things such as shearing sheep can be done in a skirt and so can riding a bike (I'll have to use your tip for full skirts being tucked over the seat since I really do like them).
My biggest question is where do you get the wool you sew with (is it pure wool?), and how did you make your snowpants?
I thrift most of my wool skirts (it’s really hard to find ones I like that fit me well, but I’ve managed to find two or three over the years, which is all I really need). Last year I found a guy on FB market place selling a bunch of wool fabric of various cuts and colors from an old woman’s house that had just passed. I bought a bunch of that and made my snow pants out of that. I will be making some baby things too! I made myself a wool dress a few years ago out of scraps. I contacted a clothing company called Revivall (she mades wool overalls) asking her if she had scraps I could buy. At the time I was working for her so she gave me a black trash bag. However, you can now buy dead-stock wool scraps on her website, I believe.
Ah! I am so excited to read this in more detail, as I was discouraged from dresses my whole life, and now, at 38, I have been finding myself drawn to them for a few years, but throw on jeans often "for convenience."
My quick little skim gifted me the gift of approaching the toilet the OPPOSITE way, as I have dipped the off skirt by accident, as well as feel quite gross about it pooling on the floor or toilet back.
Thank you!
Doing things in dresses truly isn’t as hard as we’ve been led to believe. I don’t have a picture but I once assisted a dental surgery in a hospital while wearing a floor length dress and it didn’t hinder me in the slightest. I wasn’t raised to do everything in dresses and no one else with the exception of my best friend was doing it but I genuinely can’t think of a single activity I do that can’t be done in a dress, and I’ve tested them all! I’ve found that having an assortment of homemade half circle skirts in various fabrics and lengths will set me up for almost any occasion. Thank you for writing this!
For decades I worked a desk job, and found that my physiognomy was happier in long loose dresses and skirts, rather than pants. I got in the habit of wearing flannel-lined dungarees when not at work, because I lived in a cold-climate area, and because they were loose enough to be comfortable. Feminine they were not. Once I retired, I started wearing those weekend dungarees all the time, and soon realized that wasn’t how I wanted to appear in the world. So I’m wearing skirts again, and it’s fine. Better than fine. Because yes, it makes a statement. At a blood donation site one time, I was approached by another woman who said “You’re wearing a skirt: are you a Christian?” And I suspect that part of civilization’s catastrophe is that men and women are no longer seen as separate kinds of people. I have been wearing my therapeutic sneakers with the skirts, which looks pretty sad, but have just chosen to get some Sunday shoes, at least. And forty-odd years ago, I hiked the Grand Canyon in a long skirt which I had made from a vintage chair-covering n my parents’ home: I don’t know what the fabric was, but it was brown, and there were white fringes on the border of the round-cornered fabric piece, which I incorporated into the finish. It was fun to wear, and went quite well with my hiking boots.🥳
Thank you for sharing!! I love your story!